Not As Expected

Kendra was quick to encourage Alan to get a job.  She used the idea of saving up money to have a child to cajole him into getting started right away.

“I’m still not sure we should be staying here,” Alan argued.  “This place isn’t ours.  We don’t even know how we got here.”

“I’ll go out and see if I can find out what’s going on, while you find some work.”  Kendra saw the moment when he came around to her way of thinking.

“See what you can find out.  I don’t really feel comfortable here.  None of this is mine.”

Kendra nodded, and left, pausing just outside the front door for a bout of evil laughter.  She didn’t know where they were, but she intended to own this place, and the rest of the world with it.

Kendra met a lot of people.  There was the woman in the blue hat.

“Hey, weirdo in the blue hat, who are you?” Kendra asked.

“None of your business.  You’re rude, and should learn some manners.”

Kendra burst out laughing.  “Be careful, or I’ll curse you to become a green monster covered in slime.”

The woman put her hand over her mouth and then left without saying another word.  Next was the jogger.

“Purple jogging suit, why don’t you wear shorts?  Is there something you don’t want people to see?”

The woman stopped and stared at her.  Since she still had an audience, Kendra went on.  “You know I saw this female llama at the zoo, she looked exactly like you.”

“I… I can’t believe you!  How can you talk to people like that?” Purple jogging suit asked.

“Oh, it’s easy.”  Kendra noticed a woman dressed in all blue coming their way.  “Here comes Miss Matchy Matchy.  Have you ever considered adding more colors to your wardrobe, Blue?”

“What are you doing harassing Vivian?  Back off.  Can’t you see she’s an elder and deserves respect.”  Blue said, hands on her hips.

In the meantime, confident that Kendra was doing her best to find out whose house they were in and why, Alan was just completing his job search.

He found a job he knew he could do, applied, completed a phone interview and was hired.  Since they had no car here he supposed he would have to take a taxi to work.

Kendra kept up her hard work, terrorizing the neighborhood.

She dealt with Blue, the two of them punching, clawing and generally tossing up a lot of dust.  “That’s what you get,” she said after winning the fight.  At some point during the fight Vivian the jogger had jogged away.

On the way back home she saw a mailman coming towards the cabin.  “What do you want?”

“I’m just delivering mail Ms. Keith.  Let me see if I have anything for you.”  He looked through his bag then shook his head.  “No, nothing, sorry.”

Kendra narrowed her eyes.  “How do you even know who I am?  Are you a stalker?”

“No ma’am, your name’s on the inside of the mailbox.  Besides, it’s all organized by address.”

“I don’t like you, and you smell like an old diaper.  I hate babies, they only get worse when they start walking.”  The mailman was backing away from her in a way Kendra didn’t like.  She moved forward.  “Are you scared of me?  I’ll give you something to be scared of.”

Pouncing on top of the mailman she beat him up to.  Fairly black and blue herself after that Kendra decided to take a break and make her criminal ways official.  She called around and made some arrangements.

“Now I really want to be mean to a child,” Kendra muttered.  She headed off to explore the town better, but she only found one other house and didn’t run into a child.  Instead, she made do with an elder who was fishing in the nearby water.

“Has anyone ever told you you smell like Depends?”  Kendra asked after a rude introduction.  Then she took a cup off of the picnic table, filled it with lake water and threw it at the woman.  “Here, let me help clean you up.”

“How dare you?  Why I’m going to report you immediately.”

“Then I’ll give you something good to report me for.”  Kendra attacked the woman, who fought back with all her might.  Of course Kendra won the fight, being young and strong.

That seemed like enough damage for the day, so Kendra headed home to Alan.  Having let off a lot of steam she thought she would do pretty well at being nice to him for a while.

Alan had been done with his game for a while.  He’d cooked enough grilled cheese, then eaten alone.  As he ate he thought maybe the answer to what happened was on the internet, so he looked it up.  What he found was pretty confusing.  It was a land deed for the house in his and Kendra’s names.  So, they did own the house, but how?

He explained this to Kendra when she got home and asked what she’d found out.

“Well, there are a lot of people around but there’s only one other house.  Our name is inside the mailbox, so…?  I guess it really is ours,” Kendra said.

Alan leaned forward and put a hand on a bruise he noticed on her cheek.  “What happened?”  He couldn’t think of anything that might cause a bruise like that but a fight and what would Kendra be doing getting in a fight?

“Oh, it’s nothing.  I just got into a little scuffle with a jealous woman.”

“That’s not good.  We should report it.  What if she hurts you again?”

Internally Kendra was amused, but she couldn’t show it.  “Please don’t make a big deal of it.  It only makes things worse.”  Kendra leaned in and kissed him.  Eventually the two of them went to bed and enjoyed a bit of fun before sleeping.

With morning came Alan’s first day of work.  They didn’t have a cent left to buy groceries, so Alan heated up the left over grilled cheese for breakfast.  Kendra wasn’t thrilled, he could tell, but she did eat.

Before heading out to catch the taxi, Alan even did the dishes.  He was in a good mood as he headed out of the house where he waited, and waited, and waited.  But the taxi didn’t come.  He called to check on it and was told they couldn’t find his address.  Hanging up, Alan tried a different cab company.  A while later he saw a mailman and it seemed reasonable to flag the man down.

“Yes?”  The man seemed wary.

“I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m having trouble getting a taxi.  Do you live in the neighborhood?”  Alan had found that being friendly went a long way towards calming people.

“Oh no, it’s okay.  I just met a woman it this area yesterday who was rather violent.”

“My wife met the same woman.  I suggested reporting it to the authorities but she was against it.”

The mailman gave him an odd look, then went on.  “Well, I don’t live around here actually, I just come in to deliver the mail.”

“Oh, well, maybe if I got out of town the taxi would find me at some major crossroad.  Which direction would you recommend?” Alan asked.

The mailman pointed.  “Just head out that way and cross the bridge when you get to it.  You know what’s funny about this area?  I never deliver any packages here.  Strange, huh?”

Alan nodded.  “Yes.  Oh, I’d better call work and tell them I’m running late.”  As Alan called in the mailman waved and went back to his work.

After a rather tense conversation with his new boss Alan headed for the bridge.  He tried to cross the bridge, but for some reason he just couldn’t.  Then a woman seemed to disappear into the stone pillar beside the bridge.  He moved in to take a closer look.  The mailman popped out of it and stopped just past him to wave.

“Wait a minute, how did you do that?”  Alan asked, stopping the man.

“I just walked across the bridge.”

“No, you walked through the cement,” Alan corrected.

“I…”  The man’s brows drew together.  “No, I don’t think I did.”

“But you did!”

The mailman laughed.  “Well, if I didn’t I don’t know how or why.  Are you still having trouble getting to work?”

“Yes, I really am.”  What was he going to tell Kendra?  She would be so disappointed.  Alan shook his head.  “I’d better take a closer look.”

He tried feeling around for a switch or latch.  Then Alan tried just walking at the pillar which ended with a scrape on his forehead.

“Maybe you just can’t have a job living here,” the mailman suggested.

“That can’t be true, can it?”  When the two of them parted neither knew much more than they had before.

Alan stood outside of the cabin for a while trying to plan out what he would say to Kendra.  She was sure to be disappointed.  When he finally went inside he thought he knew what to say.

“This world is different.  I think the rules might not allow me to work outside of it.”  Alan wasn’t sure how he would work within it though.  He hadn’t seen any offices so far.

“Stop with the excuses.  How are you home already.  Why aren’t you at work.”

“That’s what I’m trying to explain.”  Alan described what had happened in detail.  She had to believe him, she had to.

“How do you expect to have children?  Where will the money come from like this.  You aren’t trying hard enough and I don’t want to hear any more excuses.”  With that Kendra got up and stalked out of the room.

She was determined to prove Alan wrong.  There were too many problems with them not being able to work.  How would she get a handhold in criminal society if she was confined to a two home neighborhood?  Kendra called a taxi and went out to the street to watch for it.  Then she called for another, and another until she’d called every cab company in the phone book.  Many of them declined her on the spot.  Others called back slowly saying they couldn’t find or didn’t service her area.

It seemed to be time to visit the neighbors.  She meant to be nice, but when she saw the woman standing with her child and teen she just sort of lost it.  “What are you, a baby machine?  How many kids does a person need.”

“As many as they can have.”  The woman stalked away after her child leaving Kendra alone with her teen son.

“You have a nice smile,” he said.

Kendra didn’t remember smiling.  Maybe it had been at the moment she realized there was a cild in town she could be mean to.  That could wait for now.

“Thanks.  Can you tell me what’s up with this place?  I can’t get out to work.”

He shrugged.  “Grandpa brought us and we can’t get out either.  My sister and I get a bus to school, but we don’t really remember much when we get home.  The grades seem to be based on what we do at home.  You know, homework and outside activities.”

That was more then she’d really wanted to know about their school.  “Well, thanks.  I need to get back to my husband now.”  She had some major apologizing to do now that she thought of it.  He could still be useful after all.

“Aw, that’s too bad.  Visit again sometime.”  He headed inside too.

Feeling defeated Kendra picked up her phone when her boss called and tried to explain.

“Figure it out soon, or you’ll be in a world of hurt!”  Her boss slammed down the phone.  It wasn’t like she could help it.  She decided that when she took over the world she owed him a good knocking down.

Alan was outside the house looking for her, so she threw her arms around him and fake cried on his shoulder.  “You’re right, you’re right.  I’m so sorry for everything I said.”

He held onto her tightly.  “It’s okay.  You were just scared, but we’ll figure it out honey, I promise.”

He sounded so sincere that she almost felt sorry for him for half of a split second.